We've been here before, with the other novels, especially GR, and I'd like to revisit.
As I read this book, the vast majority of the characters are male and even in the relatively major female characters I never really sensed much of what would be considered conventional femininity. We've encountered the USSMK, Ann Kittenplan who's about as feminine as the East German women's swim team, Avril, the Incandenzas' mother but also for the most part serves both the role of mother and father, Kate Gompert who's nothing but horridly depressed and finally Joelle who we see mostly as the "pretty girl" and not particularly feminine. At the same time, Infinite Jest IV or V tells its viewer, "Death is always female and that the female is always maternal. I.e. that the woman who kills you is always your next life's mother" (788). Why such a strong focus on death as female? Why is this what people want to hear? that their mothers are "SO VERY SORRY" (839)? Or more puzzling why can Jim Incandenza alone endure the film?
Thoughts?
We also see other female characters, like Joelle's mother, who are torn apart by their husbands' actions and commit unspeakable acts, like the acid throwing. We encountered the mother who ate pastries until she pretty much exploded, Gately's mother who drank herself to death (vodka and peppers... remember?), Marathe's skull-less wife... There are also many different female characters (in every sense of the word) who live at Ennett House. What about Pamela, Gately's alcoholic girlfriend? Pretty much every female encountered is atypical and pretty much all of them exhibit an addiction or obsession of some kind.
In response to your question, I think most people have a stronger familial bond with their mother and mothers are generally seen as the primary caretakers. I guess it seems more fitting that the mother would apologize to her infant. I really don't know why JOI alone can view the film. I don't remember, what do we even know about his mother?
Sorry, long comment.